The Shit I Hear!
Once in a while I hear STUPID, STRANGE or FUNNY shit that’s worth sharing! So when I do, I’ll make sure you do too!
- Nov. 27, 2010
Where: At a friend’s house
Who: Anonymous
What: “Life is like a cigarette. You enjoy smoking it but at some point you have to put it out.”
My Thoughts: Oh My God! If I actually give this phrase the time of day and think about it, there’s actually some meaning to it.
- Nov.9, 2010
Where: In the car
Who: Anonymous
What:
ME: “If you keep braking like that, I’m gonna’ hurl in your car.”
ANONYMOUS: “I can’t help it, that’s the way I hit the pedal. I don’t rest my foot on the ground so as not to ruin my shoes.”
My Thoughts: OMG, I think she has a point. But I’m still gonna’ throw up!
- Oct. 6, 2010
HAS ANYONE HEARD ANY DUMB OR FUNNY SHIT LATELY? IF SO, FEEL FREE TO SHARE CAUSE IT SEEMS I’M EXPERIENCING A SHORTAGE OF IT!
- Apr. 21, 2010
Where: Nowhere special
Who: Anonymous
What: “My life is hell. I’m always busy. Or my phone is ringing, or my mom needs me, or my little cousins are at the house, or my trainer is working me, or I’m doing my hair, or I’m doing my massage, or I have to shower, or dress and put on makeup… You see? This is my day! I know – sad but true!”
My Thoughts: Hmmm…tough life. You must be exhausted!
- Mar. 14, 2010
Where: In a restaurant
Who: Anonymous
What: “Men were not created to be monogamous. We f*** as easily as we pee!” [translated from Arabic]
My Thoughts: I hate to admit it, but he has a point.
- Feb. 20, 2010
It seems I haven’t heard any good shit in a while. But don’t lose hope, there’s tons of people out there spurting stuff out every minute. I’ll hear something worthy of sharing eventually :).
- Feb. 7, 2010
Where: Nowhere special
Who: Anonymous
What: “I love Chanel. Even if they made ‘poopoo’, I would still buy it!”
My Thoughts: Lol! Oddly enough, I think she has a point.
And for some reason, I can also picture Marilyn Monroe saying something of the sort.
- Feb. 5, 2010
Where: Nowhere special
Who: Anonymous
What: “I peed on my husband while sitting behind him on the jet ski.”
My Thoughts: Ewwww…
- Feb. 2, 2010 (but in fact – not too long ago)
Where: In a house while playing cards
Who: Anonymous
What: “I didn’t cheat! She didn’t even see my cards when I showed them to her.”
My Thoughts: Are you seriously going with that argument?
- Feb. 1, 2010 (but in fact – a couple weeks ago)
Where: Nowhere special
Who: Anonymous
What: “Does ‘Ugly Betty’ get pretty in season 2?”
My Thoughts: Yes, she does. She becomes one of Mode’s super models and the show’s name is changed to ‘Beautiful Betty.’
- Jan. 29, 2010
Where: Nowhere special
Who: Anonymous
What: “I think it’s official. All of my braincells are dead; even the one that was in the coma.”
My Thoughts: …
- Jan. 28, 2010
Where: At a lunch
Who: Anonymous
What: “I fanny farted at the gynecologist today during my pap smear.”
My Thoughts: Hmmm… could the title of this page be more perfect?
- Jan. 26, 2010
Where: Over the phone
Who: My bank’s Client Relations Officer
What: “I’m really sorry that you haven’t been able to use your credit card for the last 2 years. I’ve tried to fix the problem several times, but I don’t know where its coming from. Should I renew the card again for you this year?” [translated from French]
My Thoughts: What do you think? Do I want to keep paying for a credit card that doesn’t work?
